I feel that effective communication skills are crucial in life if we want to better understand what people mean when they speak and to allow ourselves to be properly understood when we are trying to bring a point across. This is important in both professional and social settings and its usefulness cannot and should not be underestimated. With this is mind, developing these skills is especially important to me as they will be of great benefit in the workplace in the future and also improve my interpersonal relationships.
At work, the importance of understanding your superiors and avoiding being misunderstood by colleagues cannot be overemphasized. For example, when your boss is disseminating information to you, practicing active listening or even trying to pick up on his nonverbal cues can aid in your understanding of what he means and even what he expects from you. This will prevent you from failing to fulfill any expectations he may have of you and you will appear to your superior as a more competent employee. On the other hand, communicating well with your colleagues at work is also important to build rapport and make it easier for them to realize what you expect from them and vice versa.
In other social settings, like at home, familiarity should not be an excuse for the lack of effective communication skills as this will strain whatever relationship we have with our family members. Many of the socio-cultural barriers do not exist at home but this still does not mean that we can take communication skills lightly as misunderstandings still do occur and disputes at home hurt the most because they are closest to our hearts. These are some of the few reasons why the development of effective communication skills is important to me.
Some Photos..
Kittens at beach resort in Perhentien
Fruits that look fake and cost a bomb in Japan
Deers in Nara Park, Japan
Multipitching in Malaysia
Batu Caves with TJC
About Me
- Matthew
- I'm a year 3 Life Science student and I love rock-climbing, playing games and mugging for exams. I also love my parents, my pet cat and the environment. I hope everyone will learn to appreciate the simple things in life and never look back in regret.
10 comments:
I think it is very true that many people do not communicate alot at home. Being one from a fairly close-knit family, I feel that it is really a pity. I have quite a number of friends who hardly exchange words with their parents/siblings. When I ask them why so, more often than not I get the reply "talk about what? nothing to talk about also." Perhaps indeed, like what you mentioned, the lack of communication is due to familiarity. When we are just starting to know a person, we would try to find out more about him/her, and hence more communication and words exchanged. But when it comes to our family, we think we already know them so well, so we don't exactly bother to interact with them anymore. Another reason for the lack of communication at home could also be the generation gap that exists. I have to admit that sometimes it takes me alot of effort to try to find something to talk to my grandma about. But it really helps that I'm rather proficient in Hokkien, so language is so much a barrier as content.:)
Ah yes, thank you for that additional insight. I do not stay with my grandparents but I've realized that language and the generation gap are both definite barriers for my maternal grandmother. Also, I think you mean "so language is not so much a barrier as content." at the last part of your comment.
oops yups haha sorry for that!
hello. There's no argument about all the benefits of effective communication in either professional or social setting that you have mentioned. Sadly but truly, many of my friends or people of our age lack proper communication with their parents or too. I think it might due to the fact that the younger generation is exposed to the newer communication channels like internet, msn, blogging, etc. that the older generation is mostly ignorant or unfamiliar with. But the thought of my mum or dad blogging is actually quite disturbing.=p One way to look at it is that they are trying too hard to close the gap between you and themselves but the other more positive way to look at it is that they are putting in the effort to relate to you. So again, it's a matter of subjective interpretation of the situation. Even the slang we use nowadays are constantly changing, for example, 'emo' used to be the the 'in' word and now, i realised youngsters are using words like 'nob' which means stupid. (Yet, my mum is still stuck at the era of 'lame'.) Hence, I feel that communication is about both parties coming to terms with the differences that lie between them. Yes, I agree it's an art of being understood.
We often mention that the people who have the closest relationship with you are your family members. Ironically, many peoply spend more time and communicate with their friends and colleagues instead. Yet, like what you mentioned, familiarity is often being taken as an excuse not to communicate so frequently. However, when hurt, it is more than often the hurt by a family member that hits you the most, which is when some others realised how much they've missed out on their family members' lives.
Joyce brought up a very good issue on generation gap. This, definitely takes effort from both parties to make communication work. I appreciate the effort my mum is making in trying to understand out thoughts and how we speak in "our language" and including emoticons in her sms-es. Thankfully for her effort, I really do feel much more comfortable in speaking my mind to her and not fearing she being able not to understand. It is always the pre-assumption of the other party not being able to understand you anyway that we often just skip telling/informing them at all.
Work communication poses a different kind of challenge whereby drawing the line between work and personal communication between colleagues. You may be very good friends outside work, but when it comes to pointing out his/her mistakes, it is indeed difficult to go about doing so tactfully and effectively without straining your personal relationship with him/her.
Not only is communication an art of being understood, but also an art to understand. =)
Matthew stated that familiarity should not be an excuse for the lack of effective communication skills. I think this is a very valid point. Personally I feel that over time, in a family or in a relationship, people tend to take each other for granted. We assume that we know each other so well that there isn't a real need to spend time together to communicate and interact. This is sad as family members will drift apart and relationship will start to turn monotonous. The home will no longer be a home, but just like a hotel where you come back to rest at night and then go out the next day.
I also agree with the point on building rapport through effective communication. By building a closely knitted team, things will be done faster and more efficiently as your team mates know what your expectations and your style of handling things. However, there is a chance that the familiarity problem might kick in. So we should always be careful and know when to draw the line between colleagues and friends. This is definitely a difficult situation especially if your colleague is also your good friend. Therefore we need communicate tactfully to avoid souring any relationship.
hey Matthew! Well done for the precise and clearly constructed post! I do agree with what you have said especially the part on family communication. I have ever heard of stories about family members not knowing that their son or brother getting married. How interesting is that?! Anyway, I believe that other than not 'failing to fulfill any expectation', it is also important to show that you are respectful and sincere to your superior. When you listen attentively, you will show certain signs that reflect that you are listening. Well, that's just my 2 cents worth. Anyhow, i guess i will not talk about family communication as Joyce an Hui Min have done a fantastic job!
Hi Matthew, i feel the point that you have made about the importance of understanding our superiors will be very crucial to our careers in the future. Listening to them actively and interpreting their non-verbal cues would take us a step closer to understand them better. By doing so, we will be able to know his/her style of working and gets what he/she wants more efficiently. Other than observing the non-verbal cues of our superiors, we should put on the right non-verbal cues when communicating with them. Here, i'm not trying to say that we must act sincere or pretend to listen to them. Although we might be genuinely listening to them, it might slip our minds to maintain eye contact or adopt a "unattentive" posture which is not conveying the correct signals. Thus, it is important to make a conscious effort to communicate, especially with superiors.
Cheers,
Chong Guan
Hey Matthew,I think that it is really important to know what your boss is conveying to you through his verbal and non verbal cues.This is so that we will interpret and get the right meanings and not create any misunderstanding.However, we should also take into account your boss personality as it will allow you to better understand his verbal and non verbal cues.It is really true that we do not communicate a lot at home.Due to the fact that we think we understand our family members a lot,we may misinterpret what they say sometimes as we assume that we understand them due to our familiarity with each other.Therefore, we creates unnecessary misunderstandings and quarrels.Therefore,It is important for us to talk more with our family members.
Systematic and clearly written! As some of your tutorial mates have pointed out, you have raised a very pertinent point about the importance of communicating effectively in the home with family members. This is especially so in this day and age when distractions abound in the house to take away the attention of children, parents, grandparents, and siblings. Many times we assume we are communicating effectively with our family members but how wrong we are! We fail to read the NVCs or to notice the other barriers (environmental, emotional and mental) that exist between us.
Post a Comment